Cuti Raya and the wish

Officially hari ni dah start cuti but I'm still at PD. In case my Board of Inquiry kena last minute request ke..dah balik Klang nanti satu hal lak nak u-turn balik sini kan. Petang ni baru balik ke Klang. Senyap sunyi rumah hari ni. I left Adam at my In Laws house since nak cuci dan kemas rumah. Ramai geng dia kat sana dengan cousins yg layan dia cam a Prince-maklumlah cucu lelaki kat Klang baru 3 orang. If he is at home, rajin sangat nak tolong I 'kemas' rumah so my MIL suh tinggalkan je kat Klang.

The neighbourhood memanglah deserted abis.I could drive in the middle of the road tau to emphasize the situation. Most of the residents are from various states. Since the majority is the Poly students and the rest are the askar working here, bila cuti panjang memanglah begini keadaannya.

I also would like to take this opportunity to wish:

SELAMAT HARI RAYA, MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN KEPADA SEMUA.

IKHLAS DARI KAMI SEKELUARGA:

LT KDR MOHAMAD SHAIFUDIN B HASSAN TLDM

MEJ JULIANA BT FAUZI

MOHAMAD ADAM MUQRIZ

Iftar ke Jamuan Raya?

We had iftar at the Officer Mess which was loaded with food and delicacies.Malaysian ni bab makan memang thumb ups. At the 'gerai' there were selection of nasi and lauk campur, koew teow, abc, laksa, fruits and ada lagi yg tak sempat nak melawat. I just ate untuk cukupkan syarat berada di sana. Really, I have this symptom whenever I'm eating outside without hubby and Adam, i don't feel like eating. I hardly touch my plate of food yg main amek je lauknya. After the initial dinner, we had terawih and solat Isya' berjemaah. Since it's family thingy maka riuh rendah la mess dgn suara budakx. Alahai..teringat la pulak kat Adam yg ntah tengah buat apa dengan hubby di rumah. I keep on thinking bout hubby and Adam sedangkan sebelum datang tadi I already cooked for them...parah dah aku ni.Sejak bila ntah jadi begini nih? Bercinta sakan sampai jiwang karat la ni.

Then sampailah ke end of the event, ada pemberian duit raya from the Commandant. Cam nak beratur sekali je...hehe..

Before balik tu dihiburkan dengan pertunjukan bunga api yg marvellous and terpaku jap nengoknya..then dlm hati aku bertanya..bunga api ni bukan ke main masa raya?ke memang orang buat masa bulan puasa?

Ntah aku..confuse dah.

When i come back from the office for shower and quick change-have to work this evening also, I notice the traffic seems lesser than days before. Goddie..the road is mine!! hehehe. Then I saw 3-4 buses are waiting for the Polytechnic's students who i gather start their holiday today. Memang sunyi sepi la the area hari ni. Nasib my neighbour balik on the pagi raya and the other one is Iban so won't be going anywhere la. I'll be working tomorrow and also on sunday as well while hubby will be working on monday and tuesday. But we're going back to Klang on Sunday. On monday I'll be on call so I have to be back to PD...hai la..

Malam ni ada lagi Majlis Berbuka Puasa at the Officer Mess. Since it'll finish around 2200 ++, we decided that I'll go alone. Adam's bed time is 2030 and if we miss it..he'll be a little monster bend on making his mommy and daddy suffer throughout the night. Tak yah la kan..Since I need energy to plough through tomorrow with meeeting for one whole day and on sunday we have parade. I'm almost allergic with meetings and the word itself make me shudder.

Orang lain sibuk fikir nak kemas rumah, nak ganti curtain, new bed sheet..aku nih sibuk dgn kerja lagi...there's a thought of hiring a maid. But having a maid is a bit of a problem for us who value privacy among other thing. Sure la kena wear hijab whenever hubby is around since hubby is concern about those thing..Aduh la..takde maid pun pening, ada maid pun pening juga..

Sepasang Kurung Biru

Khairil Johari Johar

Tiada salam atau ucapan

Tiada pesan tanda ingatan

Suasana penuh keriangan

Ku teringat pada seseorang...

Di hari yang berbahgia ini

Hatiku kosong dan sepi sekali

Betapa manis kenangi lalu

Menyambut raya bersama denganku

oh...

( korus )

Tiada bisikan lembut yang ku dengar

Hanya suara azan sayup bergema

Masih kurasakan hangat tanganmu

Di pagi raya bersalam dengan ku

Tetamu datang tetamu pergi

Namun tak tiba orang ku nanti

Hanya sepasang kurung nan biru

Menjadi teman mengubat rindu ku

Words fail me when it comes to this song...I'm spechless with sadness.

Kad Raya dari Ija

Ni le kad raya dari memberku Ija.Thanks dear for the thought.

Kad Raya Pertamaku

This is my first card raya di alam blog.Kindly sent from Perth.Thanks ye Lemongrass aka Kak Min.

Tagged by Aishah

1) What is the most important thing in your life?
Only one?hmph..being blessed by Allah swt.
2) What is the last thing that you bought with your own money?
Fresh milk..
3) Where do you wish to get married?
Eh?my parents' house la but married already.
4) How old do you think you will be permanently owned by your love?
I would like to say and wish till the life after..
5) Are you in love?
Yup.
7) Name the latest book that you bought?
The Shophaholic series.
8)What is your full name?
Juliana Fauzi.
9) Name a person that you really wish to meet in real life for the first
For real? Well..Usman Awang I guess for his soulful thinking.
10) Christina or Britney?
Can't be bother with these duo.Who are they anyway?gehgeh..
11) Do you do your own laundry?
Yes, alternately with hubby.(Marriage is about sharing right?)
12) The most exciting place you want to go?
Mecca for Haj but I really want to go to Paris (hubby went there without me..huhu)
13) Hugs or kisses?
Both of course.
14) Point out 5 things about the person who tagged you.
Loving mother.
Passionate with her family well being.
Dedicated blogger.
A lucky women with twin and expecting again.
Cheerful person.
15)8 things I am passionate about
Reading-books
Family
Work
Arsenal-against my MU fanatic hubby
Shopping
Blogging
Photography
Cooking-just recently
16)8 things I say too often
Yes sir/ma'am
Ok
I'll look into it
Adammm...
Mommy say no right?
What?
Ya Allah
Shesh..
17)4 books I’ve read recently
Love in a Torn Land
Shopaholic with baby
Shopaholic Dreamworld
Aa+Bb
18)8 songs I could listen to over and over again
Anything by M.Nasir and Ella (hubby will laugh at this) and a loud music IF I'm in desperate need of idea.
19)8 things I learned last year
Moving is painful.
Packing and unpacking are a horror.
Learn to do everything on my own-lucky it was for awhile only.
I can't be separated from Adam more than a week.
Don't trust anyone before you really know him/her.
Always recheck what you did.
Filing is so important.
To say you hate someone when you're not is painful.
20)8 people that I love to tag
I don't have that many blogger friends la..but if the people listed below have read my blog, please jawab la ye.hehe..
Soup herba
Ija
Lemongrass
Hana
Rosmah

When breathing is easier..

For a while I adopted deep breathing just to calm my nerve, for patient and for sanity. Been asked several time by hubby if I have difficulty with breathing or I have chest pain or what not.

And for 2 days in a row, I manage to breath normally.I got back from work at 1500, which is so good (my house is already like a wreck ship-hubby said exaggeration from my part) and I finally have time to clean the house. Belum start with 'spring cleaning' yet coz tak larat nak buat sorang.

Shopping pun have to wait till this saturday.Even this saturday and sunday I have to go to work..I promised my mom to go back to Taiping this weekend but have to cancell it since it had been declared a working weekend. Mom was disappointed since she already finished working on Adam's baju melayu and she really want to see how it looks on him.But I think she had learnt from past experiences that I can't promise anything since plans in my life are almost non exist.

Holiday is coming soon and my students are losing interest with their studies...so if I insist on teaching, it'll be like talking to the wall and making my throat even drier. So I just sit back and let them talk whatever they want to talk about as long as it is in English.You wouldn't guess the magic of it..they really talk in English!!It is entertaining for me...and make me a happy teacher.Learning is not all about completing the syllabus but what the students achieve along the way...

Masalah kah ini?

Sepanjang bulan Ramadhan 1429 Hijrah ni aku rasa dugaan dan cabaran banyak sungguh. To narrate the causes and effects memanglah tak cukup space.
As a soldier (yup..I am) aku rasa at all time I set my mind that anything is possible.Plans could be changed in just a snap. Since hubby is also a soldier, we thought we are prepare for all sort of things.But sometime bila dah terlalu kerap berlakunya last minute changes..orang yg sesabar hubby aku tu pun bleh blow.

Working at this current place..aku baru moved from Lumut early this year..banyak perkara yg ad hoc.Working with the Navy and working with the Army is soooo different.Since aku dah merasa ni boleh la tahu bezanya. Memang tak boleh plan apa bendanya pun..bila plan cuti tetiba ada meeting hari Ahad.Plan nak beli baju raya last weekend kena batal coz tetiba lak kena keje dari pagi sabtu sampai la pagi ahad..balik rumah aku drive macam org yg lalok coz terlalu mengantuk.Hubby yg patut dah gerak ke Lumut terpaksa la tangguh dulu.
Actually, memang patut hubby aku blow dengan Komandan aku ni pun coz dia terpaksa cancell banyak comitment dia just because unit wife dia memang fail dari segi management and planning..Hubby aku yg sibuk dgn projek, dgn site pun bleh kalah dgn aku yg a mere teacher in the Armed Forces.
Raya tahun ni pulak..aku yg tak sure cuti atau tak..bayangkan.Nasib tahun ni turn Klang..kira dekat juga dgn PD ni.If turn Taiping mau aku meraung juga..
Aku yang pening ni dah jadi tak tahu macamana nak berfikir dengan wajar..cuti raya ni pun macam tak cuti juga..dgn kertas soalan trial SPM nak mark, dengan Board of Inquiry lagi nak siapkan..fenin fenin..

Bagi yg membaca..tak semua tempat macamni keadaannya..bergantung kepada siapa Pegawai Memerintah.Macam sebuah kapal la..if Kapten pandai kemudi, ribut ke taufan ke..tak de kesan tapi if Kapten nye buta tuli..alamat tak ribut pun kapal rasa macam tempuh ribut.

Itulah aku, seorang guru dan seorang askar
Itulah hubby, seorang jurutera dan seorang askar

The Miracle

Nilah appoinment card pertama aku after the initial check up yg confirmed aku pregnant.

Ni pulaknya adalah Adam Muqriz yg gave the technician and the gynae a hard time to capture his..shall I say shape?hehehe..and also very elusive to gave us the sound of his heart beat..oo..play hard to get eh sayang?

Ni pula adalah scan pertama dibuat kat Malaysia right after I came back.After 21++ hour of flight and after lugging all the heavy luggages..got spotting the next day and hubby was vvveeery worried though I said it was nothing but he wanted to make sure everything was ok.

He is a miracle in our life..hehehe..tak dapat ku bayangkan if a day without him...

Close ups

I would like to introduce the hottest babe in my life.I can't say in town coz ada lagi yg hot.Photo-photo yg menikam kalbu ni diimport dr Shashinki web page.Tempat selalu singgah untuk window shopping.Maklumlah, semenjak menjadi seorang mommy yg berjaya ni..jarang la dapat 'atur' kedai untuk window shopping. Lebih cost and energy effective untuk duk depan komputer 'jalan-jalan' cari barang. Dah berkenan dihati baru la gi kedai yg dah survey tu untuk beli dan bawa balik. Well, at least taklah penat badan nak 'kejar' hero ku itu 'berlari' di shopping complexes..

Inilah 'baby' terbaru yg akan membuat appearance tak lama lagi..hailah..tak sabar rasanya.

Baby Raya

As the title above, semasa umat Islam seluruh dunia are preparing to celebrate the Eid,ada juga antara kita yg akan menyambut kelahiran baby yg pertama,kedua.ketiga dan seterusnya.Not to be left behind, I juga insyaallah akan menyambut kehadiran 'baby' kedua dlm our small family ni. Jika tiada sebarang complication or aral melintang, akan datanglah 'dia' sebelum bergema takbir Hari Raya.Itu yg I harapkan..sangat berharap sebenarnya sampai takut even nak bermimpi..takut kehadirannya tak jadi..aduh..alangkah kecewanya nanti perasaanku (Mej Rahman tolong check my sentences betul or not ye.
I think we had waited long enough to celebrate the day of 'baby' arrival. Hopefully kami dapat menyambut kedatangannya nanti..If arrive awal pun lagi la bagus.Then I have time to belek-belek dan mengaguminya dlm masa sendiri..hehehe..

Heck, I'm being so vague here..the 'baby' I'm so excited about is the brand new-most alluring-most wanted-Nikon D80.A DSLR type of cam which is my one of dream come true. Asalnya mahukan Nikon D300 tapi mengenangkan diri sendiri yg bukannya pro pun dan bukannya nak buat business pun jadinya turunkan sket la tahap mimpi tu.Lagipun,sedangkan D80 ni pun kena 'ikat perut' juga..apatah lagi nak mencapai D300..huhuhu..kena 'ikat satu badan' agaknya.

I've been waiting for the moment to come for almost half a year-not bad la kan.Insyaallah akan I postkan segala experiments with my brand new baby.
The real baby?INSYAALLAH coming soon..

Kelesuan yg menggila

Ayat ni baru belajar maknanya dari Cikgu Bahasa Melayu yg cool yg duk sebelah meja I.Dia ni 'veteran' sket dah tapi lawak bleh la tahan 'mudanya'..hehehe..masa dia masuk ke pejabat yg sunyi sepi ni dia nampak aku duk menyapu minyak cap kapak ke dahiku ini..and ditegur juga wajahku yg agak pucat menurutnya.Oleh kerana aku ni bukannya type perempuan yg suka pakai lipstik melainkan PERLU sahaja mungkin nampak macam tak bermaya.Tapi memang pun rasa agak kepenatan dan kelesuan.Bila aku mengukur ketinggian timbunan kertas soalan di atas meja, aku rasa macam gayat.hehehe..bila la nak surut nih.Jadinya ini merupakan de facto juga kut.Then jeling-jeling kat table calendar tu ada dua tarikh yg dibulat warna merah...huhuhu..datelines la maknanya tu.Nak pasang lagu yg 'heavy' di bulan yg mulia ni rasa tak wajar..perkara yg melalaikan..yg selalu aku pasang bila nak cari ilham.Assignment yg Mej Wan minta tolong buatkan about 9/11 pun tak disentuh lagi..lagi la berpinar-pinar pemandangan aku di dlm pejabat yg sejuk dingin nih.
I think I need a fresh air kut.dari sampai pagi tadi terperuk dlm pejabat ni je.Hari ni jelah yg aku free pun...dalam seminggu hari bekerja ku.

Cutix PD

Hari ni coz rasa mood masih ditahap tak normal, jadinya taklah masak anything special pun just panaskan lauk semalam.My sisters were here during the weekend jadinya demi adik-adik ku masak la juga walaupun penat tahap gaban dah. Gambar-gambar kat sini takde kena mengena pun dengan perihal masak..just wanna share few pics taken masa temankan adam and hubby main air. Enjoy.

Pleasant surprise

I guess dengan aku yg lifeless and demotivated every time balik keje, hubby pun perasan.My usual self is happy with segala jenis lawak jenaka yg tak masuk akal sometimes...nyakat hubby and Adam and my endless chatter.Hubby mentioned about the quietness of the house sampai bunyi burung pun dah boleh dengar (coz dia kata usually mommy talk and talk sampai dia tak dengar bunyi lain dah..hahaha..yeah right). Reasons are:
Aku dah penat memekak giving orders kat pejabat..penat bercakap berkali-kali about one single thing for hours..as for this week hari minggunya diisytihar hari bekerja..trying damn hard to be optimist, maybe dapat cuti raya awal kut. Then my comrades said that cuti raya might be very short as we might be called to work on the second day of raya. As for the officers, we maintain the charades of good humour but not for our subordinates as they are hoping for a week break at least.So to keep up their shattered happiness and motivation, I have to work the extra mile in ensuring people have no reason to kill each other doing the tasks. So damn taxing if I may say.
How could I be so sane, calm and happy with these issues? Mungkin tidaklah jawabnya...Jadinya balik keje last week hubby dah spring out a nice surprise for me...sangatlah terharunya daku..sampai teary eyes la jadinya..terlalu euphoric with the joy I don't care what present he gives..hahaha..the thought that count kan?jadinya hadiah apa tak penting.Yang penting...aku rasa dihargai oleh orang yg aku paling sayang.The perfume is too sweet for my taste yg suka fresh smell nih tapi tak cakap apa la..still grateful.But did dropped a little hint la kat hubby like 'Oh, I thought a Nikon D80 camera..but this is even better..' sambil senyum ada makna..hahahaha..believe me..hubby just knew what I was thinking by saying that.I'm still waiiitinggggg....hehehe.

I still remember..

Today is the date of my friend's birthday.How I long to wish him and although I can't think of any present to give..I would like to say that I wish him a happy and blessed life forever.
I am not good with dates (numbers la to be exact) but I will remember those important enough to be remembered.And this particular friend of mine is truly specially no matter who he is to me now but for me he is always my friend.
I made mistakes in the past and one of it for letting him go believing false statement from me...I was being ME and by being ME..I'll be carrying a huge ego and pride and won't let anyone near me no matter how deep I'm hurting or howI care and love that person.
It was so stupid of me by doing what I had done but I can't turn back the time and even then, I still can't change anything..
I wish I could see him one more time and will be given chance to tell him that what I said to him years ago was a lie. And the lie had punished me but I accept it as fate.
We are not meant to be together, even without the lie..we won't be together.I am destined and fated by Allah swt to be with my husband.
I hate to lose a friendship because of silly things..and that what usually happen to me.

Nature 2

Gambar ni di ambil di halaman rumah ibu aku kat kg.Baru pas hujan and being a person who love bau after hujan..keluar and nampak shot menarik (menarik bagi aku la kan).My mum lak bising takut aku kena hujan nanti demam..I'm still 3 years old in my mum's eyes..

Masa Adam tengah leka bermain, mommy dia pun 'leka' la layan kamera cari shot yg menarik.Selalunya I sibuk dengan Adam tak sempat la nak ambil gambar tapi bila ada orang tolong tengokkan..apa lagi..

Ni gambar Adam ngan Mak Usunya kat Taman Tasik Taiping.The place is our fave spot seisi keluarga (dekat je ngan my mum's house) so sangatlah selalunya ke sana..Ni gambar ni guna teknik multi exposure untuk editingnya.

Mcam-macam la

As the title kat atas tu, aku rasa serabut sangat dlm 2 minggu ni.Balik rumah je temperature pun naik bila tengok rumah bersepah..selalunya boleh pula bersabar dengan Adam yg sepahkan toys dia..boleh je aku kutip (dan Adam akan tolong la style dia) tanpa bersungut.Apalagi bila dia merengek-rengek minta dukung..mula la keluar suara soprano dari type alto aku ni..aku ni yg dah macam nak putus pinggang kerja nak dukung dia rasa macam nak patah dua dah..SUNGGUH aku penat minggu ni dan SUNGGUH aku rasa tertekan sangat dalam 2minggu ni.
Maka secara automatiknya aktiviti yg baru diceburi terpaksa la diperap dulu.Hubby senyum-senyum je bagitau ada 3 butter bars dlm fridge yg dia kata, 'Yang, butter banyak-banyak tu bila nak hilang eh?'
Aku plan banyak sungguh sebenarnya...ingatkan cookies raya tahun ni nak buat sendiri, ingatkan nak buat cheese cake yg hubby suka makan, ingatkan nak buat itu dan ini..last2 yg I manage to buat was creme' caramel je..hahaha..sambil-sambil dukung Adam yg fussy coz demam.Hubby cam impressed kejap (ke aku yg perasan..hahha) aku mampu lagi wat something untuk berbuka.Dua orang jejaka aku tu dah habiskan 3/4 creme' caramel tu..so kiranya sukses la usaha aku tu berdasarkan peratus pecahan yg dah lesap tu.
Hari ni plan nak masak spaghetti tapi since hubby takde ada jamuan berbuka dan aku lak malam ni nak membuka dan memasang senjata..rasanya kenalah postpone dulu..aku gigit jelah butt styer tu nanti.hahaha...

Menu berbuka versi rajin

Today I'm in my rare rajin mood to cook..at least for this week I feel so malas to cook for our buka puasa.Maklum la..kat Malaysia ni bila Ramadhan je ada pesta makanan..best known as PARAM..it offers variety of foods.Yg tak pernah jumpa pun masa Ramadhan ni ada.Yang penting sediakan ongkos sahaja la.

Ayam tu aku masak madu, cedok dari resepi HANA..thanks ya.And the vege soup tu resepi sendiri je.Soup tu la makanan hari2 aku masa di US dulu masa buka puasa since alah takleh makan benda lain.Acar timun tu lebihan semalam sebenarnya.

Nature 1

Just wanna share my photography experience.Taklah as bagus as the pro tapi bolehlah sekadar hobby.I learn thru my eyes (obviously ler kan) and experiment with the camera.Baca jugak le buku and other ppl's work tapi for me the understanding come from doing it myself.Nak join gak the classes for photography but that have to wait till the time come (bila idaman kalbu berada ditangan la).

Meetings

A meeting a day give my head a full blown headache.
Seriously aku ni dah hampir nak allergy dengan ayat meeting tu sendiri.
3 days in a row ada meeting dah hampir membuatkan aku collapse dah ni.If the meetings were about planning or brainstorming, taklah 'ribut' kepala aku ni.
Ni ala ala drowning-yourself-in despair-type of meeting manalah tak kelam jadinya.Baru je mukadimah dah kena 'hambur' nye meeting yg aku tak tahan..walaupun secara lahiriahnya semasa meeting ni takde yg kena 'hambur' personally (konon nak maintain the level of professionalism la) tapi everybody know who is responsible for what. Tulah aku cukup nyampah ngan post-mortem meeting.Like post-mortem mayat la..not so nice and clean kan?
Malangnya the understanding of post-mortem ni dah di misunderstood dah.Patutnya mencari kesalahan dan cara mengatasi di lain kali bukannya kesalahan dan siapa yg wat salah dan apa yg patut dibuat pada orang yg buat salah tu...patut ke?
Ni lah kita..hidup as orang yg jahil.

Tinta Keyboard

Been awhile aku tak menjenguk blog yg aku rasa my space for escapism ni.For those yg rasa aku ni macam cuba lari from facing the facts of life..bukan as what you think.Hidup tetap perlu dihadapi dan setiap problem harus diselesaikan if can't be ignored.Cuma as a person, aku perlu ruang untuk diri sendiri..
So here I am, menyelit jugaklah dalam jutaan blog yg ada..berkongsi kisah seharian seorang perempuan, isteri, ibu, anak, kakak, pekerja, orang bawahan, orang atasan dan seorang individu.